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Badfic Quotes!

You just can't stop a train.

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Have you ever encountered a line in a fan fiction story that made your brain implode or caused you to fall off your chair while laughing hysterically? Share it with us!

The Rules (based on those of deleterius, written by tviokh)


1. Be nice - mock the story, and don’t mock (or threaten!) the author. Remember, most of us probably have a badfic skeleton in our closet. (kma definitely does, and is willing to show her own badfics from days gone by.)
2. No linking to LJ accounts. Post the quote but no link or username in this case. Linking to communities is okay.
3. Don't post whole chapters or whole fics (even drabbles!). Also, don't post only links to badfics.
4. Please LJ-cut any long/sexually explicit/gross entries. Also, please don’t use any naughty icons in posts (but using them in comments is fine!)
5. Any member of this community found to have attacked/trolled an author whose quote has been featured here in their personal LJ/site/ff.net/by e-mail, will be immediately banned. This also applies to grudgewankers.
6. As we have had duplicate posts in the past, please check the first page and the memories/tags for your fandom to see if the quotes you want to post might have already been posted. Yes, we have seen "My Immortal".
7. If you need to mock a badfic for its bizarreness, do it in one entry. Seeing the same fic mocked over and over again chapter by chapter is extremely annoying, pisses off the mods and might get the entry deleted. Certain exceptions can be made for fics in a series, but this will be up to the mods to decide.
8. Don't assume readers will magically know what fandom your post is from. Either tag the entry, or put it in the subject line. This will also assist the mods in archiving the posts. (You're welcome (encouraged!) to tag the entry with the name of the fandom, if it has already been featured. If it has not been featured yet, a mod will make a tag for you.)
9. Although this community is largely for bad fan fiction quotes and summaries, bad quotes from other sources (fic reviews, weird stuff encountered IRL) are allowed - although we do ask you to mark them OT in the post title. Badfic-related things that are not quotes are also allowed as (occasional) OT posts. We do ask you not to post quotes from author profiles on various fanfic sites as this breaks rule # 1.
10. For authors of the quotes featured here - you've posted your fic on a public forum, and thus, it can be read and commented on by everyone. We're just featuring bits of your stories that create bizarre mental images and amuse us greatly. We've got nothing against you personally. (And yes, we do have real lives. We don't spend all our waking hours mocking.)
11. Please limit the badfic quotes with comments to 1000 words and under to avoid the "tl;dr" syndrome. If you want to post a longer sporking, you’re welcome to post it in your personal LJ and link to it in your post. Also, if your post consists of in-jokes between you and your f-list, please keep it in your own LJ.
12. OT posts should be limited to Sundays. If you come across a flier, syllabus, email, non-fic posting, what have you, please hold off on posting it until Sunday. Profic is still considered badfic and can still be posted on any day.
13. If you ignore said rules once, the mods will warn you and possibly delete your entry. If you ignore the warning, further action will be taken, possibly resulting in a temporary or permanent ban.
14. For posters of the quotes featured here -- they MUST be in a public domain. No snagging unposted material from an unsuspecting source to mock here. (Your own unposted material is okay, as you were only unsuspecting when you wrote it.)
15. Do not use language (in your commentary or in your comments on posts) that is sexist, racist, ableist, homophobic, or otherwise hurtful. It is neither funny nor cute, and will not be tolerated.
16. If the badfic excerpts you posted are more readable than your comments, you're doing it wrong. Grammar has been abused enough in badfics; please do not abuse it any more. Capitalization, spelling, and punctuation are our friends, so let's please live in harmony with them.
17. Mods are not your best friend. They're not soft and cuddly. They uphold the rules that are in place for a reason. Arguing with mods and calling them jerks if they tell you you're doing [insert rule or common sense thing here] wrong will not endear you to them. Don't forget the mods can ban you if they so desire, which they will most likely do if you call them names. One of the mods is the community founder and the rest are long-term members who know what they're doing.
18. If you wish to advertise a community here on badfic_quotes, please contact a mod for approval before doing so.


(The Unwritten Rule: Put down any drinks/food/sharp objects before reading the community. You’ll be happy that you’ve avoided spewing/choking/impaling yourself later!)

If you have any questions or would like to report a rule violation, contact the moderators, kma, mprice, sarcasticsra, and subluxate. They don't bite. Unless you ask them to. Mod placeholder post here.

schizoauthoress is our associate graphics moderator.

Our current user icon has been made by kma.

Since the community has grown quite large over the years, effective May 1 2008 it is switching to moderator-approved posting access. TO RECEIVE POSTING ACCESS, PLEASE COMMENT HERE.

For issues with other members or if you think there is abuse going on in a post, you can -->CONTACT A MOD HERE
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