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Badfic Quotes!
You just can't stop a train.
Because one of your mods was a badficcer a long time ago... 
25th-Apr-2006 05:34 am [er, mod wisdom, x-files]
south park kmanderson
Back in 1998/1999, when I discovered fic, I wrote the most bizarre crap. I still have no idea where it came from. Some of the weirdness can be explained by my grip on English, which was a bit wonky at that time.. but the rest... So here is a bit from one of my first (and last) X-Files fics:

"You could be dead by then, and your son with you," the man said coolly, but his voice not sounding as cold-blooded as usual, as he looked in the eyes of the woman.

And I won't even touch my early ER fic, which is a giant badfic quote all on its own...
Comments 
25th-Apr-2006 02:59 pm (UTC)
You are much braver than I am. My first fic was completely re-written because there was so much wrong with it. Can you say Mary Sue? And the deleted scenes are hidden away so well that even Klaus wouldn't be able to find them. (Which means they're lost.)

Wow, that's cold. Well, not exactly cold, maybe slightly cold. Kinda coldish. *brain go boom just thinking about it* XD

25th-Apr-2006 03:20 pm (UTC)
Hehe - I know my early fic was crap, and I am happy to see how much I improved since then, so I post my badfic to show that one can indeed improve. And be happy that I didn't post my very first fic. It makes head go boom on so very many levels. And my Mary Sues were: Montana (yes, I am not joking. Reading Kurt Vonnegut did something to my brain), my Supah!Speshul genius doctor in an "Emergency!" fic that was never published, and Gwendolyn, who was the daughter of Jarod and Miss Parker on Pretender, also thankfully never published...
25th-Apr-2006 05:26 pm (UTC)
You're brave. (I started writing badfic at age nine, and live in terror of ever seeing those fics again. Curse my mum helping me use fora back then.)
25th-Apr-2006 07:10 pm (UTC)
Anonymous
I've learned to accept my badfic. It's really horribly amusing now. Even more so than the phone RPG of sorts I used to my play with my friend when I was 10, wherein my cat was Legolas...
25th-Apr-2006 07:10 pm (UTC)
Ack. That was me...
25th-Apr-2006 10:23 pm (UTC)
And it's still better than the Real Person fics I wrote when I was eleven/twelve *shudders at memory* I fear someone finding those (offline; I submitted one of them to a site, but it closed down shortly after. Thank God)...
13th-May-2008 07:16 pm (UTC)
I recently found some fanfic I wrote when I was around 11 and it is utter drivel.

It's just...bad. All "Baby I love you" and "Sweetie you shouldn't have."

By the way, awesome community. =]
1st-Jul-2008 04:18 am (UTC)
Anonymous
You brave bastard. But better than mine. I was one of those 11-year-olds who *wince* thought the "truth-or-dare" fanfics were absolutely HILarious.

God, how I despise my younger self.
24th-Aug-2008 02:13 pm (UTC)
I have a few terrible fanfics under by belt from my early days. I couldn't show anyone even if I wanted to - they have long since been removed for their criminal crappiness.
28th-Oct-2009 01:19 am (UTC)
Oh god.. I beat ALL of you.
I used to write fanfics about..The Jonas Brothers.
And then I named them after their songs! Ohgeez..
Thank god I grew out of that phase, huh?
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